12 wishes in 2012

Christmas & New Year text messages are not so common nowadays but of the few I received, there’s one that I would like to live by for the whole of 2012. Special thanks to Kizzy for sending it on New Year’s Eve. 🙂

  1. Sunrise after the darkest of nights.
  2. Friends who bring out the best in you.
  3. A love that makes you smile.
  4. Belief that anything is possible.
  5. Courage to finally do what you’ve been putting off.
  6. Time for yourself.
  7. Promises that are kept.
  8. An answered prayer.
  9. A heart that forgives
  10. A happy feeling everyday.
  11. A soul that heals.
  12. A wonderful life & perfect health.

More words when I find time this week. I’m hitting the sack early tonight… part of my commitment to make a lifestyle change (which is a whole other blog post!).

let me interview the lion of Oz

***free writing***

I want to run a marathon — but can’t or won’t. Same thing as I don’t want to live away from home — can’t or won’t.

Typing a way on empty thouhgts seem weird. I keep on editing things that are in my head. Afraid to offend. Afraid to not make it. Afraid to fail. Afraid to admit that I am not good enough a writer.

I think I stopped being good the day I decided that no one can read my work. I never joined the school paper perhaps because I was too shy… or maybe too afraid to fail… or maybe just because I am afraid that someone else is better. You see, the logic goes that if I do not show anyone then I never get compared. And in the end, you can’t fail when you don’t start the race.

Weird because I told someone exactly that just a few days ago. It’s a matter of courage, I preached.

Perhaps, it’s time face my fears.

People think I am fearless and that I don’t care about what they think. The irony is that I do, I just ignore them to keep me sane. Because every day I am misunderstood and every time someone hates me feels like being in a straight path to a fired cannon. Gut-wrenching.

Every time it happens, I shake the tears away. Not because I am too proud but because if I start to weep, I know it probably won’t end. So I quickly remind myself that my love and the few people that like me are enough to keep me still.

Thank God it still works… so I am grateful.