Sometimes I wonder if I see me correctly,
I wonder whether I know me better
or is it others who see the real me?
Mirror, mirror, tell me
do I not see me clearly?
Lord, give me strength
to meet another day,
to fight for a difference,
to make a lasting change.
I am too tired to fight it
Too drained to even try
In the confines of my darkness,
it gets colder as i scorch.
Bittersweet and painful,
I feel better as i feel worse.
I long for comfort that cannot come
and i simply descend to slumber.
Let me sleep so I can be awakened
…and tomorrow let it be forgotten.
There are things I regret
And one of them is you.
For trusting and forgiving,
For stupidly believing.
Long years are not worth
the vanity and deceit.
The narcissictic tendencies
that build a fake reality.
Mirrors make light shine
but broken people don’t.
Even when put together,
cracks will always show.
Pity, pity, pity
How elusive your contentment is.
No nervous breakdowns for 4s & 5s
No 3 days of crying over my first broken heart
No several years of redefining myself or
pathetically going after the definition I wanted.
No year of being stuck in a sordid affair
No infidelities stuck in my conscience
No moments I wish I had not wasted or
counting things I could have easily gotten.
No questions about being in the right place
No dreaming about those that utterly failed
No wishing for second chances or
silently wanting to wake up in a different bed.
No remembering happy moments
No better appreciation for those who stayed
No wisdom that comes from being deeply wounded
or learning that life is life because of choices.